oldest son...

the oldest son has come home...first for a dental visit and decided to stay. he decided to jump into a language class and made the drum below in one day then gave it to my brother, his uncle...first drum. it's a big thing, REALLY

so...i would still LOVE to have that jimmy choo...

i'm not noble...or special

my thoughts are earthy

and sometimes just plain

silly

i would love a jimmy choo

or dolce and gabbana sunglasses

it's just that there are

a few other issues to be

dealt with first...

hm?

new nookshii

so...Saturday we had decided to take a drive to Umatilla to check out the store that for awhile been closed and was now open again...we dinked around for awhile to "get ourselves going" and made a few stops...went downtown and there were HORSES lined up in the street and people dressed in old time attire - amazing and fun. We lazily walked down the street greeting each horse and snubbing the one who didn't like us. Cows were in the next street and we had to greet them as well! stopped at the "old lady store" and I picked up a bag of things and had to leave them there since they only take cash...went to the hawk shop where sad beadwork sat behind a glass wall...beadwork done with loving hands and giving hearts sold for a pittance of its value and for what??? none of my business really:-)

ON TO UMATILLA!!! a beautiful drive, sunny and thriving with spring joy. When we got there we looked around in the store and SERENDIPITY...my brother bought me a brand new pair of nookshii...otter fur wraps for my braids...oh luxuriously rich and thick and shiny...can't wait to wear them!!!!

We drove on and tended to the mundane task of grocery shopping but even that turned into a party because that's who we are and that's what we do:-)

Thing is, I am no one special. Here I am though. Here I am

These words, spoken from the heart of my dear sister, struck me to the core in their simplicity - and I hear it, do you?

"Thing is, I am no one special. Here I am though. Here I am,"

ahhhhh...therein lies the humility of greatness!

light of a new day...

people used to tell me in a life frought with daily drama and travail...adopted into a strange place by ultra-conservative euro-american family, the last child of four and the only brown skinned human for fifty miles..."it will all look better in the light of a new day" i think it was my aunt dorothy who first told me this...i'd gotten into some kind of scrape with the cousins and while they all danced past with a mere shaking of the head and a frown my adopted mother took a more severe view of the childish pranks we'd undertaken which was usually the case. in the aftermath i was left a sodden mass snuffling pitifully into my sleeve when my aunt dorothy found me and hugged me...a painful hug, for this was the nature of my adopted mother's discipline...and she smiled at me (aunt dorothy) taking my chin with her smooth cool hands and looking deeply into my eyes..."it's okay, you'll feel better tomorrow in the light of a new day"

This is where all hope sprang from in my youth...and this is what i share almost daily with my children, my friends...those around me in the midst of chaos and trauma...this is not a vain hope grasped at with desperate clinging fingers. this is the strength from which i faced my future every single day of my life during those years. and from time to time in more recent years.

oh how i wish to look into the future when i'm gone and wouldn't it be nice to see my children passing this strength to theirs?

and to my friend in the midst of her personal tragedy and grief...how i wish i could hug you and bring you cups of steamy green tea...if i were with you i would sit silently by and listen to your sorrow and cry hot tears of deep empathy for your pain...i don't offer words...for therein lies empty promises and hollow platitudes...

i only offer you this...each new day brings you and yours closer to Healing...each new day brings the Light a little more deeply into your beings...each new day is Hope.